[FFML] [Exalted]The Broken Circle 2/5

DB Sommer sommert at connecttime.net
Mon Mar 8 13:19:17 PST 2010

Sorry it took me so long to get to this:

miashara at deepfriedpuppies.com wrote:

>Exalted is the creation and property of White Wolf Publishing. No
>As desperately as we needed to bring Angel to medical care, taking her  
>directly to one of the doctors of Nibeldamt would prove its own death  
>sentence. We were of the opinion that the Dynast would probably be a  
>little testy after everything that had transpired 

%  Yeah,  I don't see them being good sports about it.

>only so many places we could hide from him. Instead we took advantage  
>of the fact that Ragara's mansion was on the outskirts of town. We  
>made for the mountains, and found a small cave. It was littered with  
>old spoor of wolf and bear, but showed no occupancy for a while.

% Search for treasure. Always do it like in D+D cause sometimes you find 
the odd magic item that got left behind.

>?Mortals, have you come to my abode to offer me a sacrifice?? it  
>asked. The voice was deep, fitting that it should come from the  
>mountainous body. It's lungs must have been cavernous and provided a  
>voice that was filled with age and the old powers.

% Odd. Questions marks seem to have replaced quotes in my version.

>Now if there's one thing I was filled with, lunacy would be a good  
>name for it. ?I'm not as creative as he is, but I'm a lot more  
>spiteful,? I admitted. ?Should you harm her, there is no limit to the  
>horrors I will eagerly seek out to visit upon you, until the gods come  
>to plead with me to stop our revenge.?
>?You stand in the presence of a god now!?

% Dog: Cool. I never killed a god before.

>?The other foundries,? said Angel, suddenly coming to a logical  
>conclusion after silently placing the intervening blocks. ?Ragara  
>controls one foundry, maybe more, and clearly makes a lot of money  
>doing it. If someone else controls the other, they could be feuding  
>and with this much money at stake, they afford some very exotic  

% Exotic assassins always make things more fun. Just look at Trigun. It 
didn't take off until the Gung Ho Guns showed up

>I stared at the two of them. ?It doesn't matter,? I explained. ?It's  
>just a personal thing.?
>?This whole thing is a personal thing,? Angel countered.

% There are varying degrees of personal, though.

>The other two of us 

% other two of us is awkward, but I'd be darned if I can see how to fix it

>Of the other four foundries, all carried the colors of brilliant  
>crimson peaks on a field of green. The same symbol was repeated on  
>great lumberyards to the south, and the city's formal garrison. Rows  
>of houses and shops bore the crimson and green, or stylized  
>iron-wrought portrayals of it. Clockwork Dog glanced at it and  
>concluded 'Gens Maheka' in a confident tone. On the southern end of  
>the city stood a large estate, less ostentatious than that of the  
>Dynast, but more defensible. Above it blew the crimson and green over  
>ornate walls that remained fully functional. Carvings and bass reliefs  

% bas reliefs

>designs and mandalas. All five elements repeated, though earth symbols  
>were most common. More subtly displayed, his wealth was apparent in  
>well crafted doors and rooms, a plethora of guards and servants that  
>wore the best in armor and livery, and imported flatware and exotic  
>fruits in baskets. Everything was amazingly functional, but no more  
>expensive the best need be.

% 'expensive than the best need be' perhaps?

>?I'm here, aren't I?? I shrugged. ?This isn't the first time someone's  
>sicked dogs on me.?

% sicced

>?You didn't lead a very honest life before coming to Highmere, did  
>you?? he observed.

% Nonsense. I was always alive during my life. Honest.

>?Murderer,? he whispered and took my consciousness with his boot.

% Nice work. It might take a while but I'll continue.

DB Sommer


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