[FFML] [Ranma] Life is Complicated, Part III

The Eternal Lost Lurker lurkerdrome at sbcglobal.net
Sun Mar 9 19:53:59 PDT 2008

> "Building codes, master," Sasuke replied.  "This is a residential
> block, and the Neriman government

Errr...change that to "the city" please? Because the phrase "Neriman
government" is utter bullshit and reads badly.

> "Would YOU please explain to ME, Kunou-chan," Nabiki broke in,
> "how in the world you got a dojo AND a brand new house built here OVER
> NIGHT?  I mean, nobody even heard a thing!  Not to mention, what
> happened to the people who lived here before?"

It's the Ranmaverse. Things get rebuilt overnight all the time, why should
this surprise her?

> "What other interested party?" she asked, somewhat baffled.  Who,
> besides Kunou, would want to build a kendo hall at the Tendou dojo?
> "Oh, it's done already?  Awesome!  That was fast."
> Nabiki felt her spine go rigid at the sound of that voice.
> "NO."  She shook her head.  "No.  No way.  Absolutely not."
> "Ahem," Preston cleared his throat, pointing at her feet.  "I
> believe you are on my property."


> "Due to an unfortunate bubblegum-accident," he was saying soberly,
> "Hinako-sensei will be in the hospital for the next month or so, and
> will be unable to attend classes."

O_O;; I....I'm not sure I even want to KNOW...

> "Hello class," the teacher greeted them.  "My name is Sakai Emi.
> I'll be your new homeroom sensei."

Oh dear...

> "You certainly have an odd collection of characters around here,"
> he commented.
> "You're telling me," Ukyou agreed wholeheartedly as she bent to
> retrieve her giant battle-spatula from where she had dropped it when
> Mousse had accosted her.  Straightening, she adjusted her bandoleer.
> "Makes things a bit difficult for normal people like us, don't you
> think?"
> Piku nodded.  "Oh, absolutely."


> Kouryuu's hold, Shampoo's legs wrapped themselves nimbly around Ranma's
> head.  At that moment he realized, with a sudden stab of fear and panic,
> that this was quite probably the absolute most compromising position he
> had ever found himself in, bar none.
> <Right on cue,> he thought, with growing dread.

Oh dear.

> <Well,> Ranma thought as she clambered dripping up onto the grass.
> <At least she waited to dunk me until all the students were gone.>

The girl has issues.

> Ranma opened her mouth, then shut it as her gaze fell on Nabiki.
> The rare glint of slyness that entered Ranma's eye made Nabiki feel
> suddenly uncomfortable.

Oh damn.

> With a theatrical flare, Ranma put a hand to her face.  "Oh, Kunou
> my darling.  I have learned of your secret engagement -- to that woman!"

WAHAHAHAHAHA! Revenge is a bitch. XD

> Nonetheless, his hands shook as he gazed at them in apparent
> horror, as if lamenting their powerlessness.  "Oh, that fate, like a
> storm at sea, hath torn me from the twin atolls of my love and cast the
> ship of my heart upon YOUR rocky shoals!"

...he's ASKING for it, with that kind of remark.

> "Kunou-chan, you really need to get more in touch with reality."
> "And you, Tendou Nabiki, need to get more in touch with humanity."


> "S-sorry to intrude," Ryouga stammered, rubbing the back of his
> head in embarrassment.  He sent a glare at Ranma, but Ranma didn't
> notice since he was clearly too busy sweating as Emi discussed his
> severe academic shortcomings with his concerned mother.

Dinner party from hell, that. XD

> "Tigers?" Emi blurted, and then felt like a parrot, repeating his
> own words back to him yet again.  "In Japan?"
> "Oh, no," he smiled.  "I grew up in the Qinghai province of China,
> near a place called Jusenkyou.  Have you heard of it?"

Oh dear.

> "Yes!" Emi shot back.  "No, actually, don't ask him -- TELL him."
> "What?"
> "Tell him, 'Ditch the other woman, or we're through.'  Just like
> that."  Emi thought it might be better if Akane just skipped to the
> "we're through" part.  But it wasn't up to her.

No kidding it isn't. In fact, she'd do well to not stick her nose in other
peoples' business altogether... :/

(Incidentally, I *really* do not like this particular character. Preston and
Kyouryuu are okay, but Emi is really, really... I dunno, but she just makes
my teeth grind.)

> "Nah," he said, giving the boy a little shake, like he was a fish
> that was too small and should be thrown back.  "Just Gosenkugi."


> "Well, do bring him in for some desert," Kasumi said,

"We've got plenty of it, after all. Sahara, Gobi..."

> romantic situation that she had failed to mention.  She certainly had
> more admirers than Emi had ever had

Gee, one can only wonder why. :P

> But right now, Emi was wondering if it had been entirely wise to
> take on Ranma and Akane as students.  She was having enough trouble just
> navigating their personal lives.

Which is NONE OF HER FUCKING BUSINESS to begin with...

I really, REALLY hate this character, and I hope she is messily killed in
short order.

"Sheik Protein? He's a mean ol' ass, Cid."
The Eternal Lost Lurker

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