[FFML] [Naruto][AU] People Lie

[Pale Rider]

> Oh, that incident.  Naruto got in a fight - with who, and over what, is unimportant.  At the start of the story, Naruto is bored and depressed,
> and getting worse - getting into fights, or otherwise getting injured, is part of it.

That may be (I don't actually think it fits the context), but if it is so then the author ought to do something with it rather than just leaving us to assume it. As I mentioned, it's clear that the episode seriously upset Naruto, which would not be consistent with his character's tendency to deceive. Indeed, getting beaten up in a fight should make Naruto happy, as it protects his secret, rather than discombobulate him to the degree that he almost blows his cover completely. At any rate, it's confusing and adds practically nothing; Iruka should get tipped off in some other way.

As for the thing with Mizuki (Matthew), my problem with it isn't that Naruto should be utterly paranoid of all adults in this characterization. There are some he clearly trusts. However, the "mission" doesn't seem like a very plausible test in the first place -- the scroll incident only worked for me in the canon source because the stakes for Naruto were so high and in that characterization he was a great deal more trusting, especially since Mizuki had spoken up on his behalf during the exam. There's none of that context here, and besides the stakes are much lower for Naruto, who in this story is pretty intelligent and calculating. Plus, he's been told that this is a scroll of high-level jutsu. He had to go to a lot of trouble to get just one from Anko; now he's getting a scroll full from *Mizuki*, whom he barely knows? Naruto should be suspicious just from the nature of the mission.

And then we come to the part where a man who is essentially a stranger has asked Naruto to do something secret and then meet him *alone in the woods*. The parallels to his earlier rape are sufficient that Naruto should be instantly on guard, if not alarmed.

Even if Naruto trusts some adults, he will not trust anyone without a relationship, which Mizuki seemingly lacks. The author could fix this either by having Mizuki groom Naruto in one or two scenes, or he could put someone else into Mizuki's role.

PR




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