[FFML] [C&C] [Fanfic][Naruto] Suiren, Chapter 12: Days...

[The Eternal Lost Lurker]

LONG overdue C&C! Sorry! ^^;;

> Spoiler and Continuity Warning: Once again, a chapter without
> spoilers! And since we're firmly in AU continuity now, i may have to
> come up with a new warning to replace this one...

How about "Chikan Warning: Do not stare directly into Haruno Sakura's
crotch, however tempting it may be"?

> Desperately, she
> searched for the narrow side-fissure that she'd noticed earlier. Maybe
> if she hid in there, that- that _thing_ wouldn't be able to find her.

The purple ninja hippo? The one that keeps popping out of every
inconceivable nook and cranny? "Did you get that..._thing_ I sent ya?"

> In her gut, Temari knew there was no escape, but her legs wouldn't
> stop. The blood roaring in her ears drowned out even the sound of her
> own footfalls, but she could still hear Kankuro's screams. Was it in
> her mind, or was he still screaming? She didn't know; she didn't want
> to know.

Sure, Temari, leave your poor brother behind to be anally raped by foreign
shinobi...or demon raccoons...

> Moving over to the sink in the corner of the room, Temari washed her
> hands and face, leaving the bedpan where it lay; they'd let her use a
> proper toilet if she asked.

The only catch is they'd videotape her doing it.

> Exactly ten minutes later, like clockwork, there was a knock on her
> cell door. Turning away, Temari placed her hands in the two red
> circles on the wall, spreading her legs and positioning her feet in a
> pair of identical circles on the floor.

ASSUME RAPE POSITION!

> She wasn't subjected to the routine pat-down and room-tossing ritual
> this morning,

Just the ra---okay, I'll stop now.

> because of complacency. This one seemed far too sharp for that, and
> unless she was mistaken, he was a member of the Hyuuga clan.

"I can see your VDs."

> blonde's lips as her jailer gave a helpless shrug. "I didn't think
> you'd go for that, but it you're taking requests, I've got a message
> you can pass along..."

"I don't think that's anatomically possible."

> "Why would it hurt?" Sakura growled, her voice husky and dripping with
> sarcasm. "After all, you only set my _ass_ on _fire_!"

H_H KINKY!!

> she muttered in a small, guilty voice. Reaching for her water, Sakura
> shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She was wearing an un-zipped gray
> hoodie over her favorite red dress today, but the black exercise
> shorts she normally wore were absent,

As were her underwear...

 and from the way she kept
> adjusting the hem of her dress, it almost looked like...
>
> "Sakura, are you wearing anything under that?"

XD!! ... H_H  *nosebleed*

 Ino asked, making a
> face. "That's pretty daring. It took you long enough to graduate out
> of those kiddy panties, but you really should wear _something_. You're
> gonna give people the wrong idea."

I *LIKE* the wrong idea H_H

> "S-shut up!" Sakura sputtered, coloring. "It's your fault!
> _Everything_ rubs!" she hissed, looking around to make sure nobody
> else had heard. "The damn burn cream leaves stains on my panties, too.

"That's not *burn* cream, Sakura-chan. You really ought to tell Gai-sensei
and Kakashi-sensei to wear condoms..."

> I got sick of it; it doesn't really hurt anymore, anyway. It just
> _itches_..."

Seven-year itch?

> When Sakura returned her gaze to the blonde girl, Ino was pleased to
> see that all trace of guilt had vanished from Sakura's fiery green
> eyes. "I can't believe you used a fucking exploding tag on me!"

Wow, it didn't just explode and set fire to her butt, it FUCKED her too?
That's some weapon! H_H

> Sakura had probably gotten that vile tongue from Shikamaru's stupid
> dad.

...............................

NOT. EVEN. GOING. THERE.

> Usually, Sakura went back to normal after she'd had a chance to vent a
> bit, but it seemed that anger wasn't the only thing that could Sakura
> make go insane; as Ino had discovered, a horny Sakura was even more
> dangerous than an angry Sakura.

WE MUST TEST THIS THEORY H_H

> Ino hated beating around the bush,

so she made Sakura sha--

Okay okay, I admit that one's pushing it.

> By the sour expression on Sakura's face, she'd hit the nail on the
> head. "I guess I'm just lucky," Sakura said acidly. "You don't have to
> sound so jealous, though. I wouldn't mind having a little more of a
> figure- just not so much that I'd need to bind up my thighs to keep
> them from jiggling all over the place."

OUCH!

> Hemming
> uncertainly, Sakura stared down at the table. "I _have_ been studying,
> but mom wouldn't like it if she knew where."

The bathhouse? The teahouse? The whorehouse?

> "Oh, come on; you know you love that stuff," Ino teased, grinning.
> "'Haruno Sakura, Super Research Ninja!' Poor, lonely ol' Yomiko-san at
> the library is your biggest fan."

*DIES* GOOD ONE!!

> "Iiinoo-chaaan!" Sakura whined, looking even more pathetic as a tiny
> frown pinched her lips beneath those twin, lantern-like orbs of
> infinite sadness.

Awwwwwwwwww.

> "Riiight- pretty kinky, Ino-chan; I know you like to be in control,
> but never would've guessed you were into _bondage_..."

Yeah, Ino's usually more into bandage, not bondage.

> *Dammit, did I fall asleep?* She must have slipped into a food-induced
> coma after her ruinous lunch with Ino. Sakura couldn't recall the last
> time she'd eaten so much meat in one sitting; it was almost obscene.

*opens mouth to make a perverted comment, thinks better of it, shuts up*

> studying, but the words were smudged beyond recognition by a warm,
> sticky puddle that had formed by her mouth.

*opens mouth to make a perverted comment, thinks better of it, shuts up*

> *Crap, Monkey-Man! I gotta hide this!*

...from a HYUUGA?

> Clearing his throat, Yoshinari glanced down at his clipboard. "In any
> event, I'll try harder to get you some professional help-

*SNRK*

Also, I imagine there's a lot of cold showers in store for poor
monkey-man...

> As she accepted the page, Sakura's gaze lingered on the seals of
> approval at the bottom. It was kind of disturbing that Yoshinari
> carried around a generic order of summons that could be countermanded
> only by vote of the village council or by the Hokage himself.

Goes with the job, I guess.

> "Did they teach you how to do this?" Yoshinari asked, holding the
> paper flat on his upturned palm. Sakura gaped in awe as it suddenly
> began folding itself. In a few seconds, a perfect origami crane sat
> cradled in his hand.

O_o;; That's...eerily similar to the pre-prep training for Rasengan. @_@

> "No roughhousing in the library!" a stern voice called from the end of
> the room, and in an instant Naruto found himself spinning out of
> control as the scrolls on the shelves all around him came to life,
> wrapping him in a cocoon paper as hard as steel.

Heheheh.

More C&C to come on the next chapter...

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This is a test of the Emergency Ass Dance System.
              ~~*~~
The Eternal Lost Lurker
www.lurkerdrome.com